Am I really "older" now?

Just the other day my 21 yr. old son and I were visiting together, at a nice coffee shop, enjoying the morning and a cup of java. In our chat, I remember him referring to being old if you're in your 40's. When I disagreed with him-- that being in your 40's isn't old...he continued to argue and say, "yes, mom, it really is." I decided to let him "think" that he'd won that argument and let it go. Even though I knew deep inside, being in your 40's was not AT ALL quite as old as he thought, especially since I'll be 44 in just 15 short days. After all, some of those guys in the Old Testament days were wayyyyy up there compared to me,right? I'm just a young chic.
In my attempt to try and "dismiss" these feelings of "getting old," I've realized that I, myself, have been dealing with the thoughts of age, life and purpose and "where is my life going, exactly?"
After having lunch with a good friend the other day, who has known me since I was 16, we decided that the forty's is just a time to "begin" to run our race differently, to run after what has purpose and meaning and brings fulfillment. Especially those things that have eternal value in word and in deed...instead of life shoving us into things we HAD to do, regardless. We're not following the Jone's anymore, we're following our hearts!
I've decided that our life in Christ is similar to getting older in some ways. You realize that you were once dominated by the cares of your 20's or should I say, the cares of the world, by what people thought or had, to measure up or thinking that being important WAS important. Or the dominant thoughts of your 30's, to keep up with the Jone's, being judgmental or critical, speaking your mind or being opinionated, or being the most spiritual of the bunch, etc, etc, etc... Ephesians 2 starts out saying we were once ruled by our old nature,by the whims and desires of our flesh...here it is in the Message...^1-6It wasn't so long ago that you were mired in that old stagnant life of sin. You let the world, which doesn't know the first thing about living, tell you how to live. You filled your lungs with polluted unbelief, and then exhaled disobedience. We all did it, all of us doing what we felt like doing, when we felt like doing it, all of us in the same boat. It's a wonder God didn't lose his temper and do away with the whole lot of us. Instead, immense in mercy and with an incredible love, he embraced us. He took our sin-dead lives and made us alive in Christ. He did all this on his own, with no help from us! Then he picked us up and set us down in highest heaven in company with Jesus, our Messiah.
In my 40's, I realize... "I"... have nothing to do with "it"...life...I'm dead...alive only IN HIM. It doesn't matter what people think, it doesn't matter if they think you measure up to what their standards or expectations of you might be, it doesn't even matter if you've struggled with life the past 40 yrs. (or however old you are), what matters is that now, because of Christ, you can be free to do and be who you really are with this new "lot in life." God does it ALL in and through you. Your job is to trust Him and lean entirely on Him. See, it's not up to me who I turn out to be, it's up to God...as long as I'm walking closely and listening. The key is you have to be close to hear... He speaks in a still small voice, remember? Then obedience seals the deal. I don't play a major role, God does, but there is some work He has for me to do.
I like what the next half of Ephesians says... ^7-10Now God has us where he wants us, with all the time in this world and the next to shower grace and kindness upon us in Christ Jesus. Saving is all his idea, and all his work. All we do is trust him enough to let him do it. It's God's gift from start to finish! We don't play the major role. If we did, we'd probably go around bragging that we'd done the whole thing! No, we neither make nor save ourselves. God does both the making and saving. He creates each of us by Christ Jesus to join him in the work he does, the good work he has gotten ready for us to do, work we had better be doing.
I've stepped into a new realm of grace, sorta speak. I've launched into a place where my past doesn't even matter...no turning back, 'cause I know God is on my side, if no one else is, He is! Success is inevitable because success comes just by embracing the Truth! Not leaning on the same mundane rituals of life or my past but embracing the new mercy, the new grace, every morning! Today is a new day of adventure. My journey awaits me. Why wait another day thinking about it? Dreaming about it? Wishing for it?
Like Dr. Suess said in one of my favorite books, "Oh the places you'll go"..."you'll be soaring high heights, you'll be seeing great sights...and YOU are the guy who'll decide where to go, and will you succeed? Yes, you will indeed, kid, you'll move mountains...100% (I changed it to 100%) guaranteed!" You're past "the waiting place." You're in the "mountain moving place." After all, aren't WE the one's who have to run with the vision?
If everything I set my hand to prospers then maybe I have something new and exciting in my hands to do? If... "as I think in my heart, that's who I become"... then I think "success and fulfillment"...I think, "higher heights, deeper places, closer to the heart of God, filled with glory and the spirit of might, able to complete my fight!"
Getting older is perfectly fine with me if I get to run a fresh race, climb a new mountain,or write a new song. Maybe then,you'd like to be getting older too? As Dr. Suess says, "this makes us the winningest, winner of all.